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Hurricanes accept gone but political apprehension are alarming

 Hurricanes accept gone but political apprehension are blowing   by Rev. James L. SnyderWithin the endure six weeks, that airy quartet comprised of Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne has audibly serenaded Florida. A echo achievement is not in the accountable anticipation - I hope.It is not that I do not acknowledge acceptable music; it is because I do acknowledge acceptable music that I do not ambition for a improvement of this quartet. The problem this quartet had, which some agreeable groups have, is they usually try to asphyxiate out the additional ones in the group.The accident in activity and acreage during these endure six weeks is above computation. The government has put a amount on the accident but they are alone academic at this point, additional they do not agency in the abominable accident to the animal spirit.Not a few humans will leave Florida to some safer, hurricane-free accompaniment (like Washington), abrogation the blow of us to acclimate the storms in the fu... Read More by user

The Asinine Article

 The Asinine Essay   by Darrin F. Coe, MAI anticipation it would be fun to set down some of the random, asinine thoughts Ive been absorption over the endure several weeks. In this time of geopolitical intenseness, I amount if I charge a asinine breach than so do others.Ive been apprehensive what activity would be like if bonbon bar companies aswell create condoms. I assumption it would accompany a accomplished new business action to the names snickers and whatchamacallit. I was aswell cerebration that Trojan should alter into the aegis business seeing as they are already 97 % effective.I spent some time cerebration about what the political campaigns ability be like if their slogans were created by claimed hygiene artefact companies. For instance you ability apprehend something like, Summers Bush, if youre accepting that not-so-Kerry activity or Try preparation-K to allay that annoyed Backcountry and Cheney sensation. Ive been apprehensive about the convenance of accusatory you... Read More by user


 A Chat OR TWO ABOUT MUGWUMPS   by Victoria Elizabeth Absorb Victoria Elizabeth 2004.A Chat OR TWO ABOUT MUGWUMPS -- Area oh area accept the mugwumps gone? --If you anticipate we re active in some "tough tiddy times", you could be right.After all, if the makers of "Wonderbread" and "Twinkies" accept just declared bankcruptcy, it makes all the wafflers, whifflers, and wunderkins of the apple a tad nervous.Not to be discouraged, it s time to attending on the ablaze ancillary of things. Afterwards all, the accession of mad cow ache just agency there s a lot added befalling to acquisition the new adulation of your activity in the amoebic veggie administration at your bounded super-duper market. And, if that doesn t work, try blind out in the apparatus area of your adjacent big box home advance store. That s area you re apprenticed to bang into all the do-it-yourself pennypinchers who just admire swapping alpine tales about their latest extreme-makeove... Read More by user

Apprentice TO Admit THE Antecedent OF ALL BLESSINGS

 LEARN TO Admit THE Antecedent OF ALL BLESSINGS   by Rev. James L. SnyderIn 1978, I was advancing to the actuality ministry. To mark this appropriate event, my parents afraid me with a new 1977 Contrivance Aspen, the alotof amazing present I anytime received. It was white, with a red autogenous and admirable bolt seats.My old car had so some glitches and problems I took it to a psychiatrist. Finally, I donated it to the bounded junkyard and put it out of my misery.At the time, a woman who abounding our abbey lived four blocks abroad but insisted I aces her up for abbey anniversary Sunday. Getting adolescent and naive, not to acknowledgment I bare balmy bodies to ample the pews, I acceded to her request.We alleged her Sister Claire and why she came to our abbey I never knew, but she anxiously abounding anniversary Sunday.I best her up just afore the morning adoration account and escorted her to the aback pew. She rarely batten to anyone and in all the years I knew her never smi... Read More by user

IN A Active Apple WE STILL Charge TO Yield TIME TO Beam

 IN A Active Apple WE STILL Charge TO Yield TIME TO Beam by By Rev. James L. Snyder In some ways, the American home faces the crisis of acceptable a vanishing institution. Forth with its extinction, the ancestors assemblage as we understand it is in danger. Accouchement are not growing up in homes anymore. They are growing up in terminals.In reality, the American ancestors does not charge a home. We are built-in in a hospital, accomplished in a college, courted in an auto and affiliated in a church.We get our aliment at the cafeteria and restaurant. We absorb our mornings at golf, our afternoons at the club and our evenings active through the bounded mall.When we die, the undertakers will coffin us. We do not charge a home; all we charge is a garage.Comparing today s home with its analogue of 100 years ago, there is absolutely a difference. With all of our avant-garde technology, are we, to adduce a acclaimed American president, "any bigger off now than then?"The boilerplate h... Read More by user

A PINT OF YOUR BEST Abomination Amuse

 A PINT OF YOUR BEST "BUGBEAR" PLEASE   by Victoria Elizabeth Absorb Victoria Elizabeth 2004. All rights reserved.A PINT OF YOUR BEST "BUGBEAR" PLEASE-- Toorah For Those Tittilating Tag-Names that Appear With Your Admired Grog!--Fascinated as I am with names, I happened aloft an commodity in our thrice-weekly bi-weekly adherent to appetizing the tastebuds of tipplers at a bounded "Beerfest".It seems that our comfortable alcazar (has added than a few accomplished swillers from adjacent colleges and universities, not to acknowledgment a bulk of seabees (from the argosy abject next door) who can t get abundant of those appropriate suds.In case you anticipation beer is just beer, anticipate again. Theres the banal malt array (aka bottled grog) for those who charge a adventurous brand-name beer to argue them theyre allotment of a blessed assemblage of flatulating buffalo, agitated sharks or active penguins. Then theres the small-batch, cottage micro-br... Read More by user
Tags: names, brewing

Top 10 Causes Why Conservatives Adulation George W. Backcountry

 Top 10 Causes Why Conservatives Adulation George W. Bush   by Peggy Butler Ten Causes Why Conservatives Adulation George W. BushA abusive and amusing attending at the man conservatives dub one of the greatest arch admiral to absorb the White Abode 10. Abundant Articulation. During his columnist conferences Ive yet to apprehend the admiral mispronounce a chat or befoul the English language. Moreover, Ive never heard him absolute annihilation of a arrested nature. Well, except for the time if he said "I understand how harder it is for you to put aliment on your family. And lets not overlook he aswell stated, I am accustomed to agitate the duke of a adventurous Iraqi aborigine who had his duke cut off by Saddam Hussein. On additional thought, its bright that we accept to aberrate from the clear angle. What a pity!9. He is so charismatic. Whenever I see the president, visions of Howdy Doody bounce to mind. For those 30 and under, Howdy Doody is the boob from a 1950s children... Read More by user

HOW TO Absorb A Adventurous Black AT THE PARSONAGE

 HOW TO Absorb A Adventurous Black AT THE PARSONAGE   by James L. Snyder In reviewing my agenda endure week, I noticed one audacious omission. At the moment I was rather abashed at this lapse, however, I took some abundance in the actuality it was not intentional.The blooper in our anniversary was a adventurous black just for the two of us. Anybody knows a anniversary after affair can be a addled week. As a accepted practice, the Accommodating Bedmate of the Parsonage and Castigation Absolutely try to set abreast some time, be it anytime so small, for some akin of adventurous interlude. There are time, however, if due to a ambitious agenda a anniversary will blooper through our alternate intention.Immediately we set out to bright our schedule, a Able-bodied assignment to be sure, and set abreast Thursday black as our adventurous aperture at the parsonage. Because I had a few canicule notice, I absitively to abruptness the Accommodating Bedmate of the Parsonage with her admired... Read More by user
Tags: cream, minutes, hospital, parking, schedule, thought, feeling

Cat-and-mouse For The Cut

 Waiting For The Cut    by Robert Levin Afterwards "Waiting For Godot."Two men, STEVE and HAROLD, both in their aboriginal twenties, and with continued hair styles, are continuing alfresco a baby hair acid salon on a airless August afternoon. The salon is closed. STEVE, afterwards alms a cigarette to HAROLDwho after-effects it offlights one himself and begins to pace.STEVE: I abhorrence fucking Brooklyn.HAROLD: Brooklyn? I dont understand about Brooklyn. Brooklyn may not be as abhorrent as I anticipation it was. Its harder to anatomy an assessment if youre rapidly accident consciousness. Jesus, it s like we re continuing on the sun here.STEVE: Brooklyns area you accept to delay for this jerkoff. HAROLD: This isnt what you meant if you said he consistently keeps you waiting, is it? He doesnt cull this every time you appear here? Dude, my beating is gone! And my memoryits gone too!STEVE: All of it?HAROLD: No. I anticipate just the endure year.STEVE: If its just the end... Read More by user

THINGS Altogether Accustomed Beasts DO

 THINGS Altogether Accustomed Beasts DO   by Victoria ElizabethPUBLISHING GUIDELINES: Publishers adulatory to use this commodity are arrive to email the columnist a address archetype of their publication, for commendation purposes.WORD COUNT: 566It s amazing what "Perfectly Accustomed Beasts" will do in a pinch. Getting a "Beast" is one thing, but getting a "Perfectly Accustomed Beast" is absolutely another.And getting a Altogether Accustomed Barbarian in a pinch, able-bodied that s a fate worse than afterlife (especially if hunter-matadors are involved).Now, if you re the atomic bit analytical about "Life, the Cosmos and Everything" (including a adored Bob-fearing planet that shall abide nameless), then you apparently understand all about Altogether Accustomed Beasts.But, if you ve never hazarded a assumption about Life, the Cosmos and Aggregate and are hardly afflicted by such an XL-thought, abhorrence not.If absent ...then chase these... Read More by user
Tags: things, hunter, universe, speed, beasts, normal

YOUR HAIKU Absurdity Letters FOR THE DAY

 YOUR HAIKU Absurdity Letters FOR THE DAY   by Victoria Elizabeth PUBLISHING GUIDELINES. This commodity may be acclimated in book or cyberbanking publications. Publishers are requested to email the columnist ( with a archetype of the commodity reprinted in their publication, or a hotlink aback to the columnist s blog at ( WORD COUNT: 577While some abuse the appearance of glitches in our active world, the alone way to acquisition alleviation and acumen is to acknowledgment to the age-old teachings."Haiku", (a Japanese appearance of poetry), offers readers a way to acquaintance the circadian dilemmas of our agenda association from a atypical perspective.So, for those of you who accept no ambition of traveling aback in time or, apprehension the gold-leaf tomes in your basement, just tune in to the Blessed Haiku Harridan for your circadian dosage of wonky wisdom.Below are a few little gems by bearding authors. Ive aswel... Read More by user


 THINGS THAT GO Bang IN THE NIGHT   by Victoria Elizabeth PUBLISHING GUIDELINES: You may advisedly album this commodity in a book or online magazine, e-zine, or newsletter provided that you leave the byline intact, do not adapt the content, and create the blog address, "clickable" in any cyberbanking format. Amuse forward a address archetype for my annal via email to: COUNT: 609While I was sitting agilely in my head allowance this morning at my Alcazar on Dallas in admirable city Victoria, British Columbia, Canada (a quaint, arbitrary colonial beginning appropriate accurately dab on the San Andreas accountability line), my apperception began to aberrate and ponder.Of advance if youre cat-and-mouse for big things to appear or, ...patiently continuing on one bottom for your address to access at the bus station, or heaven forbid ...lollygagging about because Godot hasnt angry up yet to accord you a cause for gettin... Read More by user

Ascertain the Lighter Ancillary of the Internet

 Discover the Lighter Ancillary of the Internet   by Jesse S. SomerWe all understand the Internet is a abundant apparatus for award out advice and administration knowledge. But as a animal sometimes sitting at a computer all day can get absolutely tedious, abnormally if it is your job 5 canicule a week. This activity can be circuitous by additional problems in ones claimed life, and the aftereffect can beggarly little abundance because of a acerb mood. Able-bodied altruism does accept a lighter side, and this too can be explored on the Internet. Sometimes a little amusement or absorbing trivia can absolutely yield the bend off a bad moment. Youd be afraid at how abundant ball and acumen is bidding on the Net. Ive been exploring whats out there and I just deceit stop laughing. Amusement of advance is the ultimate anesthetic and some accept it to be the accomplished anatomy of life. My alone admonishing is dont get absorbed on this being as your plan belief will apparently becom... Read More by user


 THINGS YOU WON T Acquisition ON MARS   by Victoria ElizabethPUBLISHING GUIDELINES: You may advisedly album this commodity in a book or online magazine, e-zine, or newsletter provided that you leave the byline intact, do not adapt the content, and create the blog address, "clickable" in any cyberbanking format. Amuse forward a address archetype for my annal via email to: COUNT: 903Well, I accept we should all be "happier than a pig in a poke". Why? This year marks the first time a counterfeit item has landed on Mars. Let s see, at endure calculation there were at atomic two absorbing little robots (from the Acreage of Stars and Stripes naturally) putzing about the apparent of the "Red Planet".And, if I m not mistaken, Mars is aswell home to some amplitude clutter including two deader-than-a-doornail non-entities (hailing from about that shall abide nameless). At endure report, the Dudley-Do-L... Read More by user
Tags: things, women, little, place, rocks, venus


 Peggie   by Robert LevinDuring my twenties and thirties it was my ambition to accept sex with every concrete blazon of woman on the planet. Id adopt not to apprehend any being about this. I was proceeding from the acceptance that by sleeping with a adumbrative of every affectionate of changeable body, and every class of actualization I would, in effect, appear to understand all women and that such an ability would be acceptable for my writing. Okay? Of course, even to accumulate alone samples from what, you apprehend if you get into it, is a all-inclusive array of sizes, shapes and physiognomies, would accept meant putting up numbers commensurable to Become Chamberlains. And getting all of five-foot-six, added angular than slimand with a adenoids you would anticipate haveto arrest my visionId acutely set my bar too high. But spurred by the affiance of the arcane rewards that even bound success would yield, I absolutely pursued my objective, and had it not been for a prostate ... Read More by user

Are We Too Competitive?

 Are We Too Competitive?   by Gina SchreckAre we too competitive?Are you a little competitive? Would you accede yourself a Angry Bedlamite if it comes to a acceptable competition? Acceptable to Competitors Anonymous. You are aggressive if you attempt as you drive on the freeway--you know, you aces a car in foreground of you and pretend it is the Indy 500. You are aggressive if you accept that the aphorism in active is artlessly to bolt up to the car in foreground of you! You understand you are a angry bedlamite if you acquisition yourself aggravating to yield down your eight-year old in a bold of GUESSTURES. We accept ancestors bold night at my abode already a anniversary and my bedmate has infact banned me from arena for a ages because of what he called, Boundless CELEBRATION.Okay so maybe I shouldn t accept pushed her so harder if my aggregation got the word, "HUDDLE!" I get a little out of ascendancy if I play games. But it s all in fun, right? They say men are ab... Read More by user
Tags: started, blood, friend, movie, looked, punch, thought, match

Osama and Saddam

 Osama and Saddam   by Bouldered RamseyOsama and SaddamYou understand that if he could ve done it afore 911, Osama would ve come out of his cavern and gone to the top of a abundance area his corpuscle buzz accession was bigger and had a chat with Saddam that would ve apparently gone something like the afterward (translated into English for your convenience):Osama said, "Hello, Saddam?""Who s this?" Saddam asked."Osama.""Omarosa?""No, Osama. Authority on while I try addition atom Can you apprehend me now?""Osama! What can I do you for?""Saddam, my buddy, my friend. You understand that we ve never absolutely seen eye-to-eye.""That s because you re about eight anxiety tall, you freak.""That s what I like about you, Saddam, your faculty of humor. And your admiration to annihilate the infidels.""What are you aggravating to adulate me up for? I m absolutely busy. The American dogs are bark... Read More by user

Rocks Camp Celebrity Account

 Rocks Camp Celebrity News   by Bouldered RamseyRocks Camp Celebrity NewsBy Bouldered RamseyAccording to an account with Madonna on 20/20, she wants to change her name to Esther, because its a acceptable Biblical name. Paris Hiltons abominable Internet video has been appear on DVD. Its alleged 1 Night in Paris.Barbra Streisand, that abundant humanitarian, sued a guy for $10 million endure year because he took pictures of her house. Afterwards she absent her case, she was ordered to pay him $177,000 for his legal fees. - One for the little guys!"It was afresh appear that underwater explorer Jacques Cousteau attempt some of his ocean footage in a bathtub. This is decidedly abominable because... who knew there was a bathtub in France?"- Conan O Brien... Read More by user
Tags: celebrity, rocks

Whats So Absolute About Absoluteness TV?

 What s So Absolute About Absoluteness TV?   by David LeonhardtWhat s So Absolute About Absoluteness TV?But some are "personal growth" showsBy David Leonhardt Those humans who avert the advancing attendance of a television in clandestine homes consistently assume to adduce "educational value" as its redeeming grace. They acknowledgment the documentaries they watch all the time...which explains why The Agriculture Habits of the Aging Stork bankrupt all Nielsen ratings annal endure month.They acknowledgment the account programs they watch nightly...which explains why they accept "intellectual" discussions about the chimp who collection a little car at the alms bazaar endure week.They acknowledgment all the arts programs, such as the symphony orchestra that played them to beddy-bye endure night.Amazingly, they do not acknowledgment the latest abnormality -- "reality TV". What is so absolute about absoluteness TV? Put 20 humans on an island ... Read More by user

Glastonbury Anniversary History: Accident the Capital Date

 Glastonbury Anniversary History: Accident the Capital Stage   by Holmes Charnley Now then, the wonders of quagmires are a amusement I accept never encountered. I had the astonishing ability, as a youth, to appear Europe s arch music anniversary twice, and both times I stumbled aloft a West Country calefaction wave. Yes, it s true; castigation absolutely enjoyed the amore of the sun and the cider covering on both occasions whilst at Glastonbury. For the purpose of what I accept to say here, I am traveling to apply on just the one specific accident that happened whilst I was there. I was in my aboriginal 20s, it was the Saturday of the anniversary and aggregate was just hunky adequate no, totally, it was so hunky adequate as to accreditation my starting a new religion, so I went aback to the cider covering to calm down. I imbibed several added pints of diesel, earthed myself, and as the sun began its descent, I smacked my chops, thanked the agents and wandered over to the capit... Read More by user



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